Helping Women Flourish in Life, Relationships, and Dreams
Fear is a normal response to a lot of situations in life, but we’ve allowed it to become a monster in far too many facets. It can literally destroy us from the inside out. It takes root in our minds and hearts. If we don’t take charge, it can spiral out of control causing us to make unwise and unhealthy decisions and keep us paralyzed in feelings of helplessness or hopelessness.
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I had been working in the yard for a few hours and decided to take a break and have a tangerine. I love a cold tangerine! I plopped down into a comfy chair on the deck, put my feet up and preceded to to peel the tangerine. I started at the bottom and peeled and peeled and peeled. It takes time as you know. As I was peeling I thought about us – us being me, you, people. I thought about how once we accept Christ He works on us kind of like I am working on this tangerine. He starts with the first layer, the hardest layer. Maybe the layer is anger, abuse, alcoholism, drug addiction, unworthiness, fear, sexual addiction – well there are many more examples but you understand what I am saying. Anyway, it takes time and sometimes the pieces don’t want to come off but he continues to work on us, never leaving, caring and loving. Finally the hard shell is gone but what is that? A softer covering that has to be peeled away and just to tease us we see the wonderful fruit peeking through here and there! So what is all of this? I thought I was doing so well! Is it gossip, white lies, taking something that isn’t mine? I pray for God to help me and He does, He continues to peel and peel and peel. He loves me and shows me that as He tenderly works on me. Suddenly there it is! The fruit, beautiful, colorful, a gift. But what is this – tiny little pieces that didn’t come off. Its ok though because I know God will take care of that too! So that’s what I thought about while I was sitting on the deck having a tangerine!
©2011 Debbie Downs
I always look forward to being together with others to share God’s love and truth. It brings me great joy, encouragement and love. I love to learn about new ways I can grow from others and sharing how God has shown me how to press on even through the muck and mire of the pits.
It can be so hard, even when things seem to be going well, to keep ourselves from reacting out of emotions, anger or hurt. Here are some of the take aways from a group environment I was recently a part of titled, “Reacting from Emotion”.
Anger is one of the most basic negative emotions. It stems from Fear, one of the two main components we have as humans. The other and the greatest need of us as beings is LOVE.
“Do not sin in your anger: do not let the sun go down while you are still angry and do not give the devil a foothold.” Ephesians 4:26 (NIV)
This scripture teaches us not to sin in our anger or to let the day end while you are still angry because it will open the door for it to begin to grow and fester, taking root and turning into bitterness. When I think about sin, I think of it in terms of me doing something to hurt someone else. It helps to remind me to think about everything I say and do beforehand and the impact it may have in another’s life. It isn’t easy to always keep ourselves in check, but it is something that God can provide for us through His Son, Jesus, if we ask Him for that strength.
Denying anger or suppressing it can cause problems to go unresolved. Unresolved anger leads to a critical attitude and words which can create an unforgiving heart (Hebrews 12:15). This is another perfect opportunity for the adversary to come in and consume control of how we respond.
If we take every thought captive, through Christ we are able to turn around any negative or hurtful thought into something more emotionally healthy. This will eliminate the opportunity for hurt from angry words to begin to brew and grow from mole hills into mountains, soft hearts to be hardened and possibly trying to resolve issues and circumstances in an unloving way. This will prevent hurt to us and others. This preventive measure could be the groundwork for creating love as the foundation of our thinking and responses. Love is kind, gentle, patient, forgiving, humble and faithful. If we can do this we are being faithful to God based upon His promise to us.
Anger is a by-product, a symptom of something else. It’s good to determine what it is that has caused our anger and take ownership of it. In many cases, anger is caused by circumstances we believe were out of our control. But rather than blaming, taking ownership allows us to look inward and see what needs to be healed in ourselves. If our focus is turned upward with a desire to have purer hearts and be forgiving no matter what someone else has done to us, we will find ourselves growing beyond the control of reacting from emotions.
When going through separation in relationships we sometimes find ourselves losing control of another and anger can be the result in this circumstance. This can lead us to react from emotions which may begin a downward spiral to the pit. Maybe it’s the recognition that we are under the condemning rule of another and our anger is a signal to free us from that entrapment. In this way anger can be viewed as a form of protection of our hearts.
“Above all else guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
Christ has asked us to guard our hearts because from the heart is the flow to others. I am thankful that His lavish grace and mercy has freed me from the ways of anger. It is only His unconditional love and acceptance that drew me to want to know more about this Being that was willing to come to the earth to be persecuted, take all my sins, past present and future upon Him and die on a cross. It is when He completed His role in a full way that God rewarded Him and us with a resurrected life, thereby which Christ now sits at the right hand of the Father at the throne in heaven and we have received the Spirit to reside in us as our guide.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples.” John 13:34-25 (NIV)
Emotions can be powerful, but God has promised us if we will listen and live out His way which was laid out for us, we will overcome through Him!
© Allison M. Horner and Pieces of the Heart, 2005-2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material and all photographs without express and written permission from this blog’s author is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Allison M. Horner and Pieces of the Heart with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.